"Pearle has a wickedly delicious imagination. She definitely knows how to get every bit of enjoyment out of her man. Thanks for a fantastic call, Pearle!"
"Pearle is an artist in erotica. Call her and take your time -- you won't be disappointed. A treat for the discerning."
"What a wonderful Lady, she is in a class by herself"
Some of you probably have heard of the “hotshot” condoms. They’re the condoms that are a smaller size marketed to preteen boys. There’s all the political arguments about how making condoms available make kids want to experiment with sex. Right. Trust me, those kids were already thinking about sex long before a small condom was marketed towards them. Nobody puts consumer goods on the market unless there’s already an audience for it.
I haven’t heard about the success or failure of the campaign to get young kids to use condoms because I haven’t really followed that part of the story. If it works, great. If not, how about some real sex education for these kids? Unprotected sex makes babies and leaves you vulnerable to disease. How hard is that concept to teach? Abstinence only? Yeah, how did that go for you Bristol?
Oops. Just a brief stint on my soapbox. Back to my regularly scheduled blog.
The main reason “hotshot” condoms came to my attention was how easily they could have been designed with a whole different market in mind. That’s right, these are just right for you teenie weenie boys. Well, some of you can’t even fill one of these can you? If I were putting them on the market, I wouldn’t call them “hotshot” either, that sounds too “manly”. Maybe “itty bitty balloon”? Or “a little bit of latex”? Or “rubbers for the guy who doesn’t really need one?”
I guess that really wouldn’t be a good market audience now that I think of it. After all, none of you itty bitty boys have much luck in getting laid do you? Once a girl gets a look at your short cummings you don’t have any use for a condom do you?
Ahh. Memorial Day Weekend. The official start of summer. Yes, I know that summer doesn’t “really” start until the middle of June, but Memorial Day is always the start of summer. Its the first long holiday weekend that marks the beginning of warm weather in most parts of the country along with holiday barbeques, trips to the beach, scantier clothing, and picnics in the park, etc.
I spent part of my weekend having hot phone sex with you guys and kick starting the summer with sizzling hot phone sex. I loved it, especially since a lot of our fantasies are moving out of doors with the warmer weather. Something about the heat of the sun on my skin and slathering on sun oil always gets me horny and ready for hot fantasies about young men serving me hand and foot while I recline on my sun lounger naked. Oh cabana boy! I need another cold drink here! You there, I need more sun oil on my nipples (I hate getting them sunburned). Or skinny dipping off a boat and feeling the water sliding over my skin – along with the hands of a hunky unknown (its dark of course). Fantasy Sex with anonymous partner (s) in the dark just seems to work better in the summer.
Then there’s the ever popular seduction of my lawn boy. MMMmmm. That one doesn’t stay a fantasy, I love how my lawn service sends me a new young man at the beginning of every summer to “try out” to see if he does a good job. I’m sure the boys talk as I never do have to wait for someone to become available. A new young man is scheduled to start tomorrow. The first day after the long weekend is always the start of a summer seduction. Can’t wait to see who I get to play with this season!
Have a fantasy about being seduced by an older woman? Of course you do and I’m it!
There’s something about a sexy older woman in pearls. Maybe its the elegance of them, maybe its their connotation of an older woman, maybe its their potential for erotic pleasures.
Pearls have become my trademark jewelry over the years. Because of my name, they are an obvious selection for birthdays, holidays, tributes. At first I enjoyed them simply for their lustrous beauty and the way they warmed to my skin when I wore them. Then I came to love the way they slid across my skin, over my breasts and nipples, teasing, tantalizing, arousing.
When I became single again and embarked on an exploration of sexual satisfaction and sensuality my trademark pearls came too. I love wearing nothing but my pearls in bed, not only are they beautiful and seductive, they can be so so very erotic.
Think of watching me spreading my legs wide for you, watching me tease my clit with my pearls, getting oh so wet and so hot to have you watching. Watch me take those pearls and slide them into my hot, slick pussy. They go in so easily don’t they? They make me squirm and tighten my muscles to feel them better, putting me on the edge. The edge that I love to walk on and hold for a time. I leave a few pearls out, enough for me to rub those smooth silky orbs over my clit.
I love teasing you. Letting you watch me take myself to the edge and sometimes over it. I love watching you get so aroused, as aroused as I am. I love telling you to tongue the pearls out of my pussy one by one and to hold some in your mouth while you roll them over my clit and make me explode.
Now, think of me returning the favor……. Call and we can make it real
Aaah. At last warm weather. There are a lot of warm-weather activities I’ve been looking forward to; hiking, swimming, sailing, gardening, having sex outdoors, enjoying the view of the young men doing yard work and construction work in the neighborhood, having phone sex with you on my patio with my bare feet on the hot flagstones. You know, the normal pleasures of an older sexy woman!
In addition, May is National Physical Fitness and Sports Month and I certainly plan to enjoy it! Nothing better to improve the local scenery than watching all those tasty young bodies indulging in physical fitness and sports. Of course some of the bodies I see need to apply themselves before they qualify as scenery, but at least they’re working on it.
There is something undeniably hot about watching someone whose body is In great condition. I know, I know not all of us (and certainly not me, but I’m perfect as I am) are able to be in tip top physically fit condition for whatever reason. I just enjoy watching a body (male or female) that is fit regardless of how it got that way, through sport, weights, dance, aerobic sex, it doesn’t matter. They’re simply beautiful to watch.
This isn’t to say that bodies of all shapes and sizes can’t be attractive, of course they can. This is a situation where beauty truly is in the eye of the beholder. I’m talking about beautifully fit bodies that take your breath away. Maybe its the way they move or are comfortable in their skin because they are so familiar with their own bodies from spending so much time on them.
Obviously, most of us can’t be in that kind of shape. For me, I’m too self indulgent and have so many other things I like to do and I hate to work out just to work out. I prefer my workouts to be an activity I enjoy, like sex. But for this National Physical Fitness and Sports Month I plan to make an effort to indulge in sports other than sex (maybe) with the payoff being enjoying such hot scenery while I’m at it!
I’ve been getting a number of emails lately asking about submissions to RateMyPindick; how to submit, how to post a picture, why wasn’t my post published, etc. So it’s time, once again, to review how you too can get your photo published on RateMyPindick so the whole world can make fun of your itty bitty dicklet.
Register
If you don’t have an account you need to register. Its fast, its easy, its free. Go to RMPD, at the very top of the page is a blue line with options. Click on PinDick Humiliation. That’s why you’re there, right? If that’s too much to figure out, go here.
Before you go any further, read the rules on the page. Yes, there are rules and we expect you to pay attention to them.
Click on the blue “Click Here”. You will be asked for a user name and an email. If you don’t want to use the family email, then I suggest you sign up for a free account with hotmail, yahoo, google, or whatever your free email of choice might be. You will be emailed a password. I strongly suggest you write down both your user name and your password somewhere so you can get back in to the site later.
Write a Post
Sign in to RMPD with your user name and password. Look in the left-hand column, towards the top you will see Posts, click on “add new”.
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again. Write something for us to read. Posting “I’m a pindick loser” or “I have a small cock” isn’t going to get you published. We know that already. Send us something interesting like how you discovered your dicklet was tiny or why your girlfriend left you because of your pindick. Put together a few sentences for us to read. Get the idea?
Post a Picture
If you understand what hosting a picture means, then you don’t need my help here. Once you write your post you’re going to want to post a picture to go with it. Very few posts ever get published without a picture. Its kind of hard to rate a pindick without one. Once your post is written scroll down to the bottom of the page. You’ll see a heading that says “Image” and a button that says browse. Click on browse and you will be taken to your computer where you’ve stored your picture. Select the picture, click open and hey presto your pic has been uploaded. Then click save.
A note about pictures. Make them clear. I realized it might be a bit difficult taking a picture of a teenie weenie dick without a zoom lens when your hands are shaking because you are so excited about this, but make an effort. Send a picture that we can see, not blurry or too dark etc.
Comments
You are welcome to post comments on other people’s posts. You are not allowed to rag on the ladies who comment because they are “mean”. The name of the site is Pindick Small Penis Humiliation NOT Be Nice to Me Because I’m a Pindick Loser. Trust me, comments calling names and complaining about what we post are not going to be published. I am in charge, not you.
I’m not Published?
If your post hasn’t been published yet, keep your pants on. You’re not the only submission this week. There’s no rule that says I have to publish all posts. Some just don’t make it boys, that’s all there is to it. I pick the ones that are different, have something to comment on or make me laugh. There are lots and lots of submissions every week, yours just may not get chosen. Put your big girl panties on and deal with it.
If you really, really, really need to be published and want to pledge your undying devotion and wallet to me, you may send a polite note to pearle@pearle13.com asking for your post to be reconsidered. Gifts are always appreciated along with your note.
Got it? Now get out those teenie weenies and take some pictures for me!
Some of you probably have heard of the “hotshot” condoms. They’re the condoms that are a smaller size marketed to preteen boys. There’s all the political arguments about how making condoms available make kids want to experiment with sex. Right. Trust me, those kids were already thinking about sex long before a small condom was marketed towards them. Nobody puts consumer goods on the market unless there’s already an audience for it.
